On handling conflict in a coworking community

How to come together when conflict arises? We're here for you.

Conflicts happen within all communities. It's natural, and is to be expected. What's not always intuitive is how to handle it.

Over the years, especially in traditional corporate settings, we've been trained to delegate all conflicts to a human resources department. We've gotten used to hiding behind our screens and either swallowing difficult interactions or venting about them to an echo chamber online.

We can do better. And coworking communities can be a part of helping us get there. We can foster environments where all members are trusted to be adults who can act with kindness and agency all at once.

At Office Nomads, we want our members to share their needs and preferences with one another so they can connect with each other as humans, rather than seeing the people around them as problems to be solved. To that end, we recently sent a message to all of our members specifically about how to navigate conflict that got more positive feedback than any other message we've sent in recent months.

Here is the full text of that message, which now also lives on our internal member portal:

Conflicts happen amirite? Yes, even in our happy li'l coworking community. With over 100 people sharing a space, we're bound to bump into each other and cause discomfort (pretty much always unintentionally). Every day is different and everyone is different. That is the beauty that is us in this place together. 

I wanted to share a little message to acknowledge the awkwardness that can come with conflict, remind us all that it's totally normal, and throw a few tips out there to help us all smooth things out when necessary. Because we should always make sure that, especially in instances of conflict, we are treating each other with care and respect.

• Address your needs simply, clearly, and kindly. If you haven't met the person you need to talk with, start with that first. Examples:

  • "Hi! I'm Susan, I'm working just over there. I'm finding that we're both raising the levels of our voices to be louder and louder throughout the day. Do you think we could reset our volumes down a bit?"

  • "Hi you two. I love that you're having this fun conversation but do you think you could just take it over to one of the couch areas? I'm pretty focused on this article I'm writing."

  • [You, waiting for the person before you to wrap up in a meeting room so you can get on your Very Important Conference Call.] Look into conference room and make eye contact. *Wave, smile, point to clock, mouth "thank you!"*

  • Remember to say thank you. It really helps.

  • The space is designed to be flexible so you can always settle into a new spot for the day to see if that helps. We all come into the space in different modes every day. Some days having lots of conversations nearby is exactly what we want. And then the next day you just want to dive into a hole. That's OK – there's usually a spot in the space that matches your mood.

  • Ask us if you need some help talking it through. Mike and I are here if you need us. Always. <3

Thanks so much for all you do to help make Office Nomads a place that we can all feel comfortable. I appreciate you. And you. And also you.

Susan

It might feel uncomfortable to face conflict head-on, but the more we do it the better we get at navigating it. Together.

It's important to acknowledge: we're not claiming to be the best at this! Have you found a way to navigate conflict that you can share with us? Reach out to us on Twitter and let us know – we love any opportunities to learn.